The Challenge of Getting Kids to Do Something
Parenting can be tough, especially when it comes to motivating children. You’ve probably tried everything—bribing, begging, or even issuing a threat. Sometimes, praise alone doesn’t work. This is where reward systems come into play. If implemented correctly, they can be transformational tools that boost motivation, bring order to chaos, and turn daily struggles into healthy win-win situations.
When structured reward systems are properly applied, they help solve many parenting challenges. These systems bring order to a household, encourage children to succeed in various tasks, and allow parents to breathe easier.
If you’ve ever thought, “My child doesn’t respond to rewards. What should I do?”, the answer is simple: you need to find the right reward system for your child. There are various types, and different children respond to different approaches.
What Makes Reward Systems Effective?
Just like adults, children are motivated by rewards. Whether it’s a treat, an outing, or a special privilege, having something to work toward can inspire better behavior.
However, not all reward systems work for every child. Some kids love stickers, while others may not care. Some prefer immediate rewards, while others are willing to work for a long-term goal. The key is finding what works best for your child.
Once you identify the right system, it can completely transform your home environment.
How to Set Up a Reward System That Works
1. Choose a Meaningful Reward
A reward is only effective if your child values it. The right motivation encourages effort and persistence.
- For younger kids: Toys, extra screen time, or a sweet treat
- For older kids: Money, movie tickets, or a special outing with friends
If the reward isn’t physical, use a visual representation (like a picture) to keep it engaging.
2. Set Clear and Achievable Goals
Instead of vague instructions like “Be good today,” define specific, attainable tasks:
- For toddlers: Brushing teeth, staying in bed, using the potty
- For older kids: Completing homework, finishing chores
Starting small helps—“Get an A on the next two assignments” is more achievable than “Get straight A’s this semester.”
3. Choose the Right Frequency for Rewards
At first, shorter reward periods work best. For example:
- Five stickers = a small reward
- Gradually increase the required effort as progress is made
The goal is to balance motivation with a manageable challenge.
4. Select the Most Effective System
Different children respond to different methods. Here are four effective reward systems:
4 Reward Systems That Get Results
1. Sticker Charts (Best for Younger Kids)
Young children love sticker charts! Here’s how to set them up:
- Use poster paper or a printable chart.
- Start with an achievable goal and increase difficulty over time.
- Reward specific activities (e.g., making the bed, brushing teeth).
- Check progress regularly and celebrate milestones!
Seeing fun, sparkly stickers motivates kids and keeps them engaged.
2. Reward Charts (For Older Kids Who Need Structure)
Unlike sticker charts, reward charts use checklists. They work best for:
- Chores
- Homework assignments
- Bigger long-term goals
Kids track their own progress, promoting independence and responsibility.
3. Coin-Based Systems (For Collectors)
If stickers and checklists aren’t effective, try a coin-based system. This works well for children who enjoy saving up for a bigger prize.
- Use plastic coins, poker chips, or homemade tokens as currency.
- Set a value system (e.g., 10 tokens = a prize).
- Create a prize box with small items like toys or treats.
- Let kids exchange their earned tokens for a reward.
This system gamifies motivation and makes goal achievement exciting!
4. Instant Incentives (For Quick Motivation)
Some kids need immediate rewards. If this applies to your child, reward them right after they complete a task.
Example: If your child struggles with staying in bed, reward them every morning they succeed.
Over time, they’ll develop better habits without needing constant rewards.
What If the System Doesn’t Work?
Sometimes, a reward system fails—and that’s okay! Adjust and try different methods:
- Change the reward type if your child isn’t motivated.
- Try a different system (e.g., from sticker charts to coins).
- Simplify the goal to make it more achievable.
Even in special education tutoring, reward systems work wonders. Kids earn stars and pick a reward after accumulating a set amount—boosting their motivation!
Turning Daily Challenges Into Wins
Parenting—especially for children with special needs—can feel like solving a puzzle with missing pieces. But the right reward system can make a huge difference.
Sticker charts, token systems, or instant incentives help parents recognize small victories. And while patience is key, the right tools can make parenting easier and more rewarding.